The Unexpected Goodbye

How do you say goodbye to someone you love, when you thought you had more time?

I haven’t written a post in more than a week, because I didn’t know where to begin. My heart just hasn’t been in it.

My daughter’s family has said an unexpected goodbye to her husband’s mother.

When my family hurts, I hurt. I don’t know how to comfort them. I try to think of something wise to say, some magical words that will take it all away, and no words come out. Only time can ease the pain. All I can do is be here for them, if they need me.

This has hit very close to home for me, because I’m the other Grandma, so it very easily could have been me. I wonder how they will adapt to the absence of someone so important in their lives.

Everything has changed. You can’t go back to the way things were, ever again. You now have a new normal.

Daily life, holidays, and birthdays have all changed.

Celebrating successes, and crying over failures will fall on someone else, where once the automatic reaction would have been to call her first.

How do you begin the process of healing, and acceptance?

I am so grateful that I had the chance to share my grandsons with a grandmother that loved them as much as I do. We had lunch together at grandparents day at their school a couple of weeks ago. We sat with the boys, chatting about our lives, taking pictures, and shopping at the book fair, little did we know that would be the last time, and that was the last time I saw her.

I could never replace her, just as she could never replace me. All I can do is honor her memory, by understanding how important she was to my son-in-law, daughter, and grandsons.

Take the time to let the people you care about know how you feel. There is no guarantee that you will get another tomorrow, so hug them, tell them you love them, and don’t hold back.

You can never be prepared for the loss of a loved one, so don’t add regret to the storm of emotions when you do.

Live the life well lived, and well loved.



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